Homework?

My counselling was cancelled today because Nicola isn't well. It's crazy how much I have come to rely on these half hour sessions with her, and I do get a bit scared about having to handle life 'alone' for a bit longer than usual: Anxiety does not react well to sudden changes in plan, it really knocks me off centre when things don't go as I had planned. However, as I won't be able to talk about progress or what I've done this week etc, I thought I would instead share with you some of the things I take away from sessions with Nicola, and things I am supposed to think about when I'm going about my day to day life. It is kind of like being back in education going through CBT, there are constantly things to think about and apply but obviously it feels a lotttt more productive than school because these are things that are going to change my life in the long run.

First up, this is a form anyone with mental health problems such as depression and anxiety will be very familiar with: I have to fill one of these in every time I see a doctor or a counsellor. The scores they take from them are recorded and so they can keep a pretty good record of how the depression and anxiety are affecting my life and me as a person over time. My scores vary a little bit but are usually high enough to be classed as "chronic" or "acute" so not great but hopefully, as life keeps on going, my scores will decrease slowly and one day I won't have to take tablets or seek as much help but that is in the future for now. As I say, this is something that should be familiar to some but is probably very new to a lot of you and so I thought it would be interesting for you guys to have a look at.

These are just some of the sheets and diagrams Nicola has given me over the last few weeks to try and help me in various ways. One of the greatest things about information like this is that it makes me feel less alone and like less of a nutter when I'm at a low point; I mean, people are writing sheets on it so I can't be the only person who gets like that right? Some of these also involve exercises and processes to try and think about and follow when you are struggling or just feeling a bit lost. As you can see, most of these are anxiety based and that is because Nicola has opted to try and tackle my anxiety and worry before tackling the real root of it all; my depression.

Anyway, I hope this was slightly informative for any of you who haven't really encountered mental illness. It's kind of weird letting you into my little world this much so please try not to judge!

Becca.